Some days everything sucks, and some days you find $2000 and two pearl necklaces while cleaning your room. 

Dear Tiny Small Precious Baby Jesus,

Please for the whole entire rest of my life and after-life (in case cause, what if, you know?) no one ever ever ever inserts "cumming" in place of "coming" (never not punning, you're welcome) in a written message. Just for all of my days forevermore. 

Thank you kindly,

cc.